Insomnia (insomnia) wrote,

The new old miracle drug!

I tweaked a muscle last night in my upper back... and what started out as a bit of kink turned into a major bastard bitch pain of spasmy spasms and muscular microtears...  I was walking all sorts of funny, like a bad Quasimodo impersonator... 

I popped a cocktail of naproxen and acetaminaphen, which is generally what I take in place of ibuprofen, because it doesn't eat holes in my stomach lining... didn't really touch it.

A hot shower did no good. In fact, I think it actually made things worse... 

That's when I turned to the healing power of alcohol! A couple straight shots of Bacardi Select dark rum to rapidly get the medicine moving... followed up with a bit of caramel Baileys, to keep it that way.

Fast relief! Not perfect, mind you, but I was actually restored to something approaching a fixed and upright position.

Still needed something for dinner, though, to kind of soften the blow.  Standing around cooking seemed like a bad idea, but I came up with a more amusing plan... 

"Grape Nuts and Baileys it is!"

It was tasty. I haven't had so much fun eating breakfast cereal since I was a kid! 

And after that, I decided to maintain a warm glow computerside, with a couple hot buttered rums... warm, spiced with cinnamon and cloves... reminds me of languidly, hungrily kissing salt-tinged black leather-clad clove-smokers in dark, sexy San Francisco nightclubs... But I digress.

Kicked back around 1 am, fell asleep watching Futurama, woke up around 8ish... feeling pretty good! Nothing that a hot tub and a cup of tea couldn't fix...

... apparently, a bit of calculated irresponsibility is good for your health! 

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