Insomnia (insomnia) wrote,

Someone just sent you a bitchy post about Facebook! Do you want to know who it is?!

 Facebook.  I don't get it. Never have, really.

I created an account a long time ago, but really, it's been nothing but misery. Really. I refuse to use it, but people keep friending me, and, well... bugging me. And the sad thing is, they're my friends and loved ones, so it's hard to tell them all to f*ck off.

I mean, at first, it all started out with connecting to a few friends I was already connected to on other sites... and a simple online hug or kiss request... and then it snowballed from there. Now, it's just completely vaccuous and annoying.

"Here's a little green patch!... Now install this software... and bug all your friends!"
Here's my middle finger. Please insert thusly.

"Who were you in a past life?!"
I'm pretty sure I was sticky and swam pretty fast.

"Can you do better than me on the friends quiz?"
I don't know. Can you get out from behind your computer and actually *be* a friend?!

"Support my cause! Help by joining, donating, or inviting your friends!"
Support my cause. Leave me and my friends the hell alone!

"I've sent you some delicious Chocolates. See what type they are and send your own to friends."
All tease. No please...  Sorry. I'm on a digital diet.

"Will I attend ____ event?!" 
No. No, I will not. Why?! Because it's a thousand miles away!

"_____ added books on Visual Bookshelf, then decided to invite you to share yours."
Don't you mean that you've decided to share the books you have decided to share? Something tells me that this has stopped being about literature, and has morphed into a contest... as if I don't already have fifty books to read which are actual classics in their genre, still gathering dust. And as for the latest books out there, if I wanted a pleasant diversion, I'd probably be surfing the 'net for porn. Besides, books are made from dead, unhyperlinked trees.  

"_____ thinks you are trustable and send you one trust point. Do you want to know how trustable you are in your friend's eyes?"
I have seen the future of Whuffie, and I am scared... because someone gave you and every other Facebook user a vote.

"What's your secret sexual fantasy?!"
(Hint: It's a secret for a reason. If you really want to know, drop by sometime and I'll show you. P.S. - Be sure to bring sexy friends... extra points for contortionists and other sideshow acts!)

So, while I understand how Facebook is a complete waste of time, what I don't get is what it's supposed to do for me that's actually helpful and convenient.  Maybe I'm expecting too much from their crappy website?!


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