Insomnia (insomnia) wrote,

A few humorous asides on the road to a financial meltdown.

So, the world's stock markets lurched and skidded downwards today until the breaks were thrown on. Major financial institutions lost between 3-6% of their stock valuation, and both the Fed and the Europeans pumped billions in to the economy to soften the fall.

But the good news, according to the Fed chairman, is that he thinks that the "subprime loan" fiasco at the heart of this financial hubbub should be "contained"... which, unsurprisingly, has caused him a wee bit of criticism.

"If the containment policy of the Cold War worked as well as this subprime-mess containment policy, we'd all be speaking Russian and living on collective farms." - Daniel Gross, Newsweek

Meanwhile... CNBC's Jim Cramer flips out, froths, screams at Fed Chairman, telling him to "wake up" and save the economy by lowering interest rates.

Critics of Jim Cramer respond with a counter-video, saying that no, the public shouldn't have to accept inflation and the devaluation of an already unstable dollar in order to bail out Cramer and his greedhead investment friends who put all their money behind bad loans. 

But yeah, the problem isn't just subprime mortgages. All the instability is also effecting subprime business loans, and a wide variety of big institutional hedge funds. Hey, aren't hedge funds supposed to be safe, balanced, low-risk investments?! 

"Two hedge-fund investors who didn't want to be identified said Thursday that the current turmoil is reminiscent of the collapse of Long-Term Capital Management in 1998."

Oops! Ah well... I'm sure it's only some major corporation's employee pension savings anyway.

Meanwhile, Hillary Clinton screams "bail-out!" for all the irresponsible jackholes innocent victims who are going to lose their home(s). Please, won't someone *please* think of poor Bruce Helmprobst of Las Vegas?! He purchased seven "no money down" houses -- three are now in foreclosure, and the others are on the brink.

"This has just really drained me emotionally and, uh, I have a lot of bills and a lot of mortgages that I can't pay and, uh, banks are calling me every day..."

Have no fear, Bruce... Hillary to the rescue!

Of course, what nobody is mentioning is the fact that nobody is losing "their homes" here. Rather, they are going to lose homes precisely because they were bought and paid for by someone else, and because the "owners" decided to pay so little money on the properties, that not only do many of them not have any equity in the homes... many of them have negative equity! Those who *do* have significant equity in their homes are either able to sell their properties -- often at a substantial profit -- or refinance their homes with a fixed-rate mortgage.

I don't know about you, but I think that if I max out a half-dozen credit cards to buy a lot of stuff, all of you should pay for it with your taxes... because, after all, it's not credit fraud... it's *MY* stuff!

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