March 15th, 2006

fashionable

US Gen. Says, "It's the oil."

US General John Abizaid, commander of US forces in Iraq, told a House of Representatives subcommittee on Tuesday that the US may want to keep a long-term presence in Iraq.

He also told them why.

"Ultimately it comes down to the free flow of goods and resources on which the prosperity of our own nation and everybody else in the world depend."

Obviously, he was referring to hummus. Gotta keep that hummus flowin'!

**Update: ThinkProgress has picked up the story, and is reporting that just as recently as 45 days ago, that it was part of US policy not to have permanent military bases in Iraq.

"It is not only our plan but our policy that we do not intend to have any permanent bases in Iraq."
- Brig. Gen. Mark Kimmitt, Central Command deputy commander, 1/28/06

So, does Abizaid not know what his own policy is anymore, or is the policy hopelessly tied to the ever-increasing longterm aspirations of the Bush administration?

Or, to summarize the situation for sci-fi nerds:

   VADER
   (to Fett)
  You may take Captain Solo to
  Jabba the Hut after I have
  Skywalker.

(Han's screams filter through the torture room door.)

    BOBA FETT
  He's no good to me dead.

    VADER
  He will not be permanently damaged.

    LANDO
  Lord Vader, what about Leia and
  the Wookiee?

    VADER
  They must never again leave this
  city.

    LANDO
  That was never a condition of our
  agreement, nor was giving Han to
  this bounty hunter!

    VADER
  Perhaps you think you're being
  treated unfairly.

    LANDO
  No.

    VADER
  Good. 
It would be unfortunate if
  I had to leave a garrison here.

(Vader turns and sweeps into the elevator with Boba Fett.  Lando walks
swiftly down another corridor, muttering to himself.)

    LANDO
  This deal's getting worse all
  the time.

Just replace Vader with Bush, Lando with the Iraqi government, Han Solo with the insurgents, and Boba Fett with a Blackwater rent-a-thug. The role of Saddam Hussein will be played by Chewbacca.

In other words, "The spice must flow."

fashionable

Bolton's mustache is just like Hitler!

U.S. ambassador to the UN John Bolton says that Iran's nuclear program is just like 9/11.

Minus, of course, the over 3000 dead Americans.
... and the ability to attack and destroy multiple US targets.
... and any indication by the Iranian government that they're going to attack the US.
... and the actual weapons needed to do the attack.
... and the enriched uranium they'd need to make a bomb.
... and the missiles they'd need to deploy it against the US.

But other than that, it's just like 9/11... or Hitler! It's just like Hitler!

Godwin wept.



And, frankly, Bolton wishes he had Hitler's mustache... and dress sense! Bolton might have the correct temperment, but he lacks the style and charm needed to be a truely gifted fascist.
fashionable

Human rights and wrongs.

In a nearly unanimous vote, 170 in favor, four against, and three abstentions, the UN approved a new Human Rights Council. So, what kind of corrupt nations would try to stop such a thing?

The US, Israel, the Marshall Islands, and Palau. The latter two are, of course, former US mandates which primarily subsist off of US foriegn aid.

It should be pointed out that Belarus, Venezuela and Iran abstained. So, does that make them our new allies?!