...so, why am I still awake?!
I felt tired and a bit stressed earlier today, but it turned out pretty well... Kirsten and I went to Kiva and had a nice long stay in the hot tub while it was raining. Mmmm, hot tubs. Mmmm rain... I could have stayed there for a long time... once I was sufficiently warmed by the hot tubbing, getting out for awhile and having the rain fall on me was really, really nice.
I'm back home now, though, in the city. I can't hear the rain anymore, and I really wish I could. I wish I could hear wind chimes or detect the smell of trees or even the scent of a log on the fire. I wish I had another bird feeder or two and some seed so that I can wake up to the sound of birds outside my window. I wish I knew what happened to the wind chimes I used to have hanging outside. Were they taken down and replaced with Christmas lights? Were they ripped down by the neighborhood children? I don't have any idea... I should bother finding out, but I've just been otherwise absorbed.
In my preoccupation, I have taken ambiance and atmosphere for granted... and now its just not there anymore. I really need to do something about the computer room - it has no ambiance whatsoever, yet it is where I spend the majority of my time. It also frustrates me that I haven't seen the adapter for the sound system on my computer, so I have been sans music at the computer for over a month. I have the new Civilization III, but I just don't have the heart to play it without music, not because the game wouldn't play fine without sound, but because without sound, it would be impossible to really decide for myself how the game really feels
In short, I think I am starving from a lack of aesthetics
. My birthday is coming up soon; if you care about me, help me find a way to transform my here (uhshielded florescent bulbs and the hum of computers) into a sustainable yet functional place that feels natural... because so often, I would rather be anywhere else but here. I need my music back. I need nature. I need a place with wind chimes and a hot tub and a large fish tank and maybe even an aviary someday...
So, am I a hippie yet?!