Insomnia (insomnia) wrote,
Insomnia
insomnia

no shortage of wisdom

So, I had an appointment this morning for removing a wisdom tooth. Looks like I have more to remove at some later point too... for some reason, I was born with five wisdom teeth rather than four, so either that means I'm particularly wise, or I'm a genetically altered super-hero. You take your choice. Apparently, I'm not the only one.

Why not six? Why not eight? Does this make any sense to you?!

The place specializes in wisdom teeth... they even have http://www.wisdom-teeth.com , which seems like an awfully overblown flash website, with both music and a propensity to crash my browser. They suggested that I go under, but I didn't see the point. I've had one wisdom tooth removed previously, and the particular person removing it made me feel very comfortable and was very quick.

So, they numb me up, lean me back indefinitely in this chair, and I'm just kind of there, nerviously twitching for fifteen minutes as the blood rushes to my head. I asked for some music, and they offered me R. Kelly, U2, or classical. I chose classical, only to find that it was a particular obnoxious version of Bach. I started twitching more, rather uncontrollably. It didn't help that they had some kind of pulse monitor going nearby, bringing back unpleasant memories. I started thinking about all the dread fears expressed in jwz' gruntle on wisdom teeth. Nerve damage, broken jaws, etc. This was *not* relaxing.

So, I ask for something else to listen to. Despite my better judgement, I choose U2, hoping for an early album. I turn my head though and see a whole stack of CDs! Hey, they have The Beatles "Let It Be"! Screw U2. I get the assistant to put on that CD instead. It's a three and a half minute song, apparently.

"Two of us riding nowhere
spending someone's hard earned pay
You and me Sunday driving
Not arriving on our way back home..."

Within thirty seconds of the song starting, Doctor Benway Jeworski comes in. The assistant takes a rubber-padded clamp thing and clamps open my mouth. The dentist steps in, makes a clean cut down the center of the tooth, and first one root section and then the next are pullled from my mouth. A wad of gauze is inserted, and I am instructed to bite down. I am also handed a big wad of additional gauze, wrapped in a kleenex.

"Ok, Mark... you're all done and ready to go!"

"Two of us wearing raincoats
standing solo in the sun
You and me chasing paper
getting nowhere on our way back home
We're on our way back home
We're on our way home
We're going home."

The song wasn't even over yet. It hadn't even hit the final verse! I should have had her skip tracks to "Across the Universe" and just hung around a few more minutes.

The dentist's shots are just starting to wear off, and I am contemplating what degree of pain reliever I am going to want. I'm not going to take the tylenol with codeine I have, as I don't think it reacts well with me, considering. Personally, I'm thinking whiskey might be the best choice under the circumstances.

I still have this hunk of gauze in my mouth and the wound is still bleeding a bit. My lack of tooth is just beginning to hurt somewhat. Someone just called my home # about a LiveJournal problem. Email me. Sheesh. Better yet, try support or abuse!

Now, if only I can figure out some way to have some breakfast...
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